AS part of my fitness regime, I bought myself a Sony Walkman and fell in love. The intention was to listen to audio books or records through earphones to help me on my way. The Happy Wanderer is not on my play list. Love happened by accident.
The Walkman came with instructions in 22 languages. Everything from Slovakian to Greek but they didn't help. Probably because I'm not the sort of person to read instructions. I just get stuck in.
Not surprisingly, I couldn't get it to record anything.
“Why don't you ask Ian,” my wife Maria said. “He's a scientist so he's bound to know.”
“Yes, but he's a Leeds United supporter. I'll end up with the Elland Road song book on the thing – We Are Leeds and the Ballad of Billy Bremner.” I'd rather let my arteries fur up.
I'm taking getting fit seriously. Not like my chum Ian.
“I sent for a rowing machine once but it arrived without oars. I sat and drifted for an hour every morning. I joined a fitness club and lost 43 pounds the first day. That was the joining fee. Then I tried the whisky diet: I lost three weeks. Finally I decided a simple fitness regime was best: up two three, down two three. Then the other eyelid.”
And yes, he's a Tommy Cooper fan.
He added a note of encouragement.
“My grandfather started walking five miles a day when he was 60. He's 93 now and we haven't clue where he is.”
I finally worked out how to work the Walkman and downloaded a talking book from Librivox. This is a website where all the books are free because they are ancient and out of copyright. And that's when I fell in love - with the voice of the reader of a very boring Victorian melodrama.
Many of the volunteer readers lack something. After all, they are not professionals. I almost gave up of finding a voice compatible to the subject matter after listening, on one site, to the opening lines of a classic set in Roman Britain read by a New York cab driver.
And then I discovered Cori Samuel. I know nothing about the lady but her voice is wonderful, her intonation perfect and her interpretation flawless.
So if anyone encounters me out walking and thinks I am a tad engrossed, it is because I am communing with Cori.
For goodness sake, don't tell the wife.
The Walkman came with instructions in 22 languages. Everything from Slovakian to Greek but they didn't help. Probably because I'm not the sort of person to read instructions. I just get stuck in.
Not surprisingly, I couldn't get it to record anything.
“Why don't you ask Ian,” my wife Maria said. “He's a scientist so he's bound to know.”
“Yes, but he's a Leeds United supporter. I'll end up with the Elland Road song book on the thing – We Are Leeds and the Ballad of Billy Bremner.” I'd rather let my arteries fur up.
I'm taking getting fit seriously. Not like my chum Ian.
“I sent for a rowing machine once but it arrived without oars. I sat and drifted for an hour every morning. I joined a fitness club and lost 43 pounds the first day. That was the joining fee. Then I tried the whisky diet: I lost three weeks. Finally I decided a simple fitness regime was best: up two three, down two three. Then the other eyelid.”
And yes, he's a Tommy Cooper fan.
He added a note of encouragement.
“My grandfather started walking five miles a day when he was 60. He's 93 now and we haven't clue where he is.”
I finally worked out how to work the Walkman and downloaded a talking book from Librivox. This is a website where all the books are free because they are ancient and out of copyright. And that's when I fell in love - with the voice of the reader of a very boring Victorian melodrama.
Many of the volunteer readers lack something. After all, they are not professionals. I almost gave up of finding a voice compatible to the subject matter after listening, on one site, to the opening lines of a classic set in Roman Britain read by a New York cab driver.
And then I discovered Cori Samuel. I know nothing about the lady but her voice is wonderful, her intonation perfect and her interpretation flawless.
So if anyone encounters me out walking and thinks I am a tad engrossed, it is because I am communing with Cori.
For goodness sake, don't tell the wife.
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